Ode to Blindness by Vicki Hannah Lein

Vicki Hannah Lein
ODE TO BLINDNESS
By: Vicki Hannah Lein
Catalog ID: 303910   Edit Type: Full Track   Duration: 4:18
Tempo: Mixed   Vocal: Female Vocals

Genre: Comedy Music | Novelty Songs

Social Media Link: https://www.stockmusicsite.com/stockmusic/archive/Comedy/Novelty-Songs/Ode-to-Blindness/303910
I’m an expert at finding humor and grit for tough times. “Ode to Blindness” chronicles some true stories of what has happened to me since I lost my central vision in 1994. An example line: “Don’t pat the butt of the man standing next to you unless you’re sure that he’s your mate.”   Keywords: Misadventures, Funny, Vision Loss, Fun, Troubles, Tales, Stories, Humor, Mishaps, Embarrassing Moments, Advice, Playful, Drama, Trials and Tribulations blind, seeing, disability, humor, lighthearted, gratitude, silly, making light of a situation, transforming hardship, upbeat, goofy, abilities, circumstances, life, frustration, reframing, having fun, joyful, joy, happiness, perseverance, playing, sense of humor



Price: USD $126.95
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Description: Ode to Blindness, Comedy Music, Novelty Songs, world music, royalty free sounds and royalty free background music

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Lyrics:
Introduction (spoken)  
I want to tell yo some true stories about what it is like being me and about all 
the adventures you might have if you lose your ability to see. 

Don’t brush your teeth with ‘Preparation H’,  It foams but it does not clean. 
and listen for the little birdie to chirp  to make sure that the light is green. 
And keep your ears wide open in case someone says: You’re going the wrong way! 
That’s my advice, I have for you If you go blind today. 

If you go blind today life can still be fun 
if you don’t go insane when people say (arms crossed) “It’s over there. 
when you ask for directions. 

Don’t walk into an airport bathroom  without first checking the sign 
cuz if you’re in the wrong bathroom the men won’t fuss or whine. 
They’ll simply raise their faces to you like so many cows chewing their hay!  (Moo) 
That’s my advice I have for you if you go blind today. 

If you go blind today life can still be fun 
if you don’t go insane when people say, 
“Can you hear?” after a ten minute conversation! 

Don’t touch the butt of the man standing next to you   unless you’re sure that he’s your mate. 
For if he’s not your husband, “Oy!  The problems you’ll create! 
Just wave your cane and smile sweetly and say,“Are you talking to me!”  Hey! 
That’s my advice, I have for you if you go blind today. 

If you go blind today life can still be fun 

if you don’t go insane when people say, “Your seat is 38B!’  
Ooo!  Ex-as-per-a-tion! 

Bridge:  Going blind is really a bummer  but it’s not a tragedy. 
Don’t let your joy die on your retina 
and you can be just as happy as me! 

If you go blind today,  life can still be fun 
if you don’t go insane 

(spoken)  
when you stick your fingers in a light socket when you’re 
trying to screw it in or when you accidentally wash your face with hair 
conditioner or when you lose your sense of humor. 

Don’t lose your sense of humor!    If you go blind today. 
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Ode to Blindness


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