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Jokes, funny lines, hilarious skits

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GEORGE CARLIN - LET ME ASK ONE QUESTION ON THE MEN - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
3539 0:07 USD $2.10  


5 MINUTES IN THE PENALTY BOX FOR AGE AND SEX CHECK - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
25813 0:07 USD $2.10  


BART - WHADDYA WANT - BARNEY BEING SHOT, HOMER LAU - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
5884 0:11 USD $2.40  


RUN FOR YOUR LIFE, IT IS A POSTAL WORKER - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
13292 0:07 USD $2.10  


THE PRESIDENT IS NOT IN... - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
24933 0:07 USD $2.10  


JEFF FOX: IF SOMEONE ASKED TO SEE YOUR ID AND YOU - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
25244 0:07 USD $2.10  


JEFF FOX: IF DIRECTIONS TO YOUR HOUSE, INCLUDE TUR - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
25238 0:07 USD $2.10  


JEFF FOX: IF YOUR DOG AND YOUR WALLET ARE BOTH ON - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
25245 0:07 USD $2.10  


MALE - THE STRAIN WAS TERRIFIC...IMPOSSIBLE...GOT - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
5484 0:07 USD $2.10  


JEFF FOX: IF YOUR TWO YEAR OLD HAS MORE TEETH THA - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
25235 0:07 USD $2.10  


IT'S NOT THE SPEED SO MUCH ... - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
12682 0:07 USD $2.10  


AND THAT'S THE WAY....SUICIDE...BACK YOU UP - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
5770 0:07 USD $2.10  


WHY WOMEN DON'T LIKE THE THREE STOOGES - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
7320 0:08 USD $2.40  


IT'S BEEN FUN 1 - VOICE JAMES - BRITISH MALE - (by Blazznet Talking Box)
Blazznet Talking Box This has been an enjoyable day. We have enjoyed ourselves, let's do it again sometime. Till next time. Deep and present voice, queen's English accent, professionally recorded with no ambiance to suit any of your production requirements. Talking, British / Male
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track (version 1) - Talking, British / Male
687756 0:01 USD $1.80  
Full Track (version 2) - DJ Sounds, DJ Humor
687757 0:02 USD $1.80  
Variation A (slower) - DJ Sounds, DJ Outros
687758 0:02 USD $1.80  
Variation B (slower 2) - DJ Sounds, DJ Vocal stingers
687760 0:02 USD $1.80  
Variation C (slower n lower) - Comedy,
687761 0:02 USD $1.80  


YELLOW, HAT - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
16322 0:07 USD $2.10  


HELLO....ALICE COOPER...LOVE TO GET BACK AT YOU - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
2867 0:09 USD $2.25  


BUD-WEI-SER ... SPLAT - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
2830 0:09 USD $2.25  


SIREN...KNOCKING...AOL POLICE OPEN UP - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
5563 0:11 USD $2.40  


GUNSHOT - MA, PA SHOT AT AOL AGAIN - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
4654 0:10 USD $2.30  


BARNEY SINGING AND BEING SHOT, SCREAMING - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
3545 0:10 USD $2.30  


AHH! WAS I DRINKING LAST NIGHT. (CANNED LAUGHTER) - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
8512 0:08 USD $2.40  


SOMETIMES WHEN I GET NERVOUS, I STICK MY FINGERS U - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
26215 0:09 USD $2.25  


BATHROOM POEM..HERE I SIT...... - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
37086 0:10 USD $2.30  


I WANT A BOWL OF RAW RED MEAT RIGHT NOW...LIVE COW - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
11979 0:09 USD $2.25  


OLD MEN TALK ABOUT SEX - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
11584 0:08 USD $2.40  


THAT'S ALL WE NEEDED, A DRUISH PRINCESS. FUNNY, S - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
8553 0:10 USD $2.30  


WHEN NATURE CALLS - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
17520 0:10 USD $2.30  


JEFF FOX: IF GOING TO THE BATHROOM IN THE MIDDLE - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
25240 0:09 USD $2.25  


MALE: JACK AND JILL WENT UP THE HILL, BOTH WITH A - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
10733 0:10 USD $2.30  


SINGLE. S I N G L E. STAY INTOXICATED NIGHTLY, G - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
26190 0:07 USD $2.25  


JEFF FOX: IF YOU'VE EVER FINANCED A TATOO ... , Y - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
25247 0:09 USD $2.25  


GEORGE CARLIN ABOUT MEN - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
25514 0:10 USD $2.30  


FEMALE: ATTENDANT, I WOULD LIKE SOME GAS ... - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
23511 0:09 USD $2.25  


FEMALE: THE NUMBER YOU HAVE REACHED, 9 1 1, HAS B - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
7374 0:08 USD $2.40  


SHE FALLS IN A WELL, HER EYES GET CROSSED. SHE GE - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
8906 0:10 USD $2.30  


MALE: I'M GOING TO GET ME A BIG BOY SOCKET WRENCH - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
21140 0:10 USD $2.30  


POST OFFICE SUPERVISOR "I WOULDN'T LAY ANYBODY OFF - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
13294 0:09 USD $2.25  


PUSSY AND BEER - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
12613 0:08 USD $2.40  


GREETINGS AND SALUTATIONS, WELCOME THE LA.... - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
18867 0:08 USD $2.40  


JEFF FOX: ... IF YOU SEE A SIGN THAT SAYS SAY NO - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
25249 0:10 USD $2.30  


NOW, I'M LOOKING FORWARD TO CANCER... - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
7413 0:10 USD $2.30  


COULD BE WORSE. HOW? COULD BE RAINING. - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
7966 0:08 USD $2.40  


GARGLED USA ANTHEM - (by Ian Hubball)
Ian Hubball The USA national Anthem gargled ! Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,
446201 0:09 USD $1.95  


MAMMARIES .... - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
11865 0:08 USD $2.40  


HERE YOU THOUGHT I WAS ANOTHER BLONDE BUBBLEHEAD B - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
27598 0:08 USD $2.40  


LECHEROUS BOB SHOOTS JANE - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
20650 0:08 USD $2.40  


SKINNY BAR, FAT BAR, FAT BAR ... A DOLLAR TWENTY. - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
17102 0:08 USD $2.40  


JEFF FOX: IF THE UFO HOTLINE LIMITS YOU TO ONE CA - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
25237 0:08 USD $2.40  


MALE: IF THE UFO HOTLINE LIMITS YOU TO ONE CALL A - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
13586 0:08 USD $2.40  


... I AM THE ESSENCE OF ALL THAT IS EVIL IN THE CO - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
8793 0:08 USD $2.40  

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Jokes, funny lines, skits


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