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Jokes, funny lines, hilarious skits



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COMIC CUCKOO SOUND - (by Pete Bax)
Pete Bax Comic Cuckoo mocking, Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,
289223 0:09 USD $4.00  


RINGIE DINGIE - (by John M. Peters)
John M. Peters Ever see the Lily Tomlin telephone operator routine? This is one mutated version of it. Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
343565 0:32 USD $3.50  


THIS CELL PHONE HAS BEEN STOLEN - (by John M. Peters)
John M. Peters We think the title speaks for itself. Check it out and see. Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
340195 0:30 USD $3.75  


GIRL CRYING_SHUT UP!! - (by AJ Pro Audio)
AJ Pro Audio Comedy Girl crying then man's voice  shouts - "shut up", Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,
359005 0:05 USD $7.15  


YOU MEN ARE ALL ALIKE - (by John M. Peters)
John M. Peters Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
338418 0:29 USD $3.75  


WE ARE THE BORG - (by John M. Peters)
John M. Peters We are Borg, but we're not boring! A parody of one of our favorite Star Trek-The Next Generation entries. Locutus of Borg! (We think Picard should have stayed Borg and run the Enterprise that way.), Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
338416 0:29 USD $3.75  


WELL RING ALREADY - (by John M. Peters)
John M. Peters So answer it, you dumb human! Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
338417 0:29 USD $3.75  


CREDITOR CALLING - (by John M. Peters)
John M. Peters Suppose your cell phone was your personal servant and a creditor was calling you? What would your cell phone say? Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
336943 0:30 USD $3.75  


MALE: THREE BLIND MICE; SEE HOW THEY RUN. WERE T - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
3369 0:06 USD $2.10  


A CROCK & BULLWINKLE STORY - (by John M. Peters)
John M. Peters This is what you've always wanted to hear from from Rocky and Bullwinkle but they could never broadcast anything like this, at least not during the original 1960s TV series! Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
352158 0:30 USD $5.55  


DON'T WORRY ABOUT LAST NIGHT - (by John M. Peters)
John M. Peters She thinks she's making you feel better by saying that. This is a great laugh for your friends to hear...unless you're afraid they'll think it's a real call from your real girlfriend! Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
338412 0:29 USD $3.75  


DEADBEAT - (by John M. Peters)
John M. Peters What does your x-wife call you when she dials your number? Play this one and find out. Well, you could look at the title but you gotta hear this one. Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
337036 0:29 USD $5.55  


IS THAT A CELL PHONE IN YOUR POCKET - (by John M. Peters)
John M. Peters Well, as a matter of fact, it is. Or is it. Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
343549 0:30 USD $3.75  


LUKE, I LIED - (by John M. Peters)
John M. Peters So, Vader lied about being Luke's father. This is where you can finally learn the actual truth. Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
338414 0:30 USD $3.75  


KID STUFF - 01 - (by John M. Peters)
John M. Peters Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
338413 0:29 USD $5.55  


KID STUFF - 02 - (by John M. Peters)
John M. Peters Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
340197 0:30 USD $5.55  


KID STUFF - 03 - (by John M. Peters)
John M. Peters Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
343552 0:30 USD $5.55  


DON'T MIND THE DOG..RUB IT ALL OVER - (by AJ Pro Audio)
AJ Pro Audio Posh demented woman's voice "Don't mind the dog..Rub it all over", Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,
359002 0:02 USD $7.15  


IT'S BEEN FUN 1 - VOICE JAMES - BRITISH MALE - (by Blazznet Talking Box)
Blazznet Talking Box This has been an enjoyable day. We have enjoyed ourselves, let's do it again sometime. Till next time. Deep and present voice, queen's English accent, professionally recorded with no ambiance to suit any of your production requirements. Talking, British / Male
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track (version 1) - Talking, British / Male
687756 0:01 USD $1.80  
Variation A (slower n lower) - Comedy,
687761 0:01 USD $1.80  
Variation B (slower) - DJ Sounds, DJ Outros
687758 0:01 USD $1.80  
Full Track (version 2) - DJ Sounds, DJ Humor
687757 0:01 USD $1.80  
Variation (slower 2) - DJ Sounds, DJ Vocal stingers
687760 0:01 USD $1.80  


LICK IT...LICK IT REAL GOOD! - (by AJ Pro Audio)
AJ Pro Audio Well spoken daft woman's voice "Lick It...Lick it real good", Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,
359042 0:02 USD $7.15  


OMG THERE'S A LESBIAN ON MY ROOF - (by AJ Pro Audio)
AJ Pro Audio Outrageous daft woman's comedy voice "OMG There's a Lesbian on my roof", Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,
359057 0:02 USD $7.15  


01.HEY BABY... - (by Big Fat Audio)
Big Fat Audio "Come On and touch my balls! They won't bite ya" Comedy voice for ecards, cellphones and emails etc [High Quality STEREO], Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,
207030 0:07 USD $3.95  


VERY SORRY TO SAY THIS..BUT I SMELL FARTS - (by AJ Pro Audio)
AJ Pro Audio Ludicrous ridiculous woman's comedy voice "Very sorry to say this..but I smell farts", Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,
359087 0:04 USD $7.15  


HEAVY BREATHING PHONE CALL - (by Pete Bax)
Pete Bax Heavy Breathing Phone Call mobile telephone sex sexy, Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,
332192 1:01 USD $7.00  


WOULD YOU MIND CLOSING YOUR LEGS WHILE I'M TALKING TO YOU - (by AJ Pro Audio)
AJ Pro Audio Extremely posh lady's annoyed comedy voice "would you mind closing your legs while I'm talking to you", Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,
359098 0:03 USD $7.15  


BRING ME MY MONKEY - (by AJ Pro Audio)
AJ Pro Audio Daft mad female's voice "Bring Me My Monkey", Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,
358996 0:01 USD $7.15  


I LOVE YOU MORE THAN FOOD - (by Pete Bax)
Pete Bax I Love you more than Food comedy monologue ringtone, Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,
333005 0:46 USD $5.65  


I THINK YOU BETTER COME AND HAVE LOOK AT THIS 1 - VOICE COLIN - BRITISH MALE - (by Blazznet Talking Box)
Blazznet Talking Box Come check this out. There might be a problem and I want you to give me your opinion. Uh-oh I don't think you are going to like this... Deep english accent voice. Slight northern accent. Computer or phone text messaging alert. Novelty ringtone. Close proximity high level recording, no ambiance. Talking, British / Male
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track (vox pop 1) - Talking, British / Male
470669 0:01 USD $2.30  
Full Track A (low down) - Comedy,
470670 0:02 USD $2.30  
Full Track B (vox pop 2) - DJ Sounds, DJ Humor
470671 0:01 USD $2.30  


ARE YOU SHITTIN' ME WITH THIS - (by AJ Pro Audio)
AJ Pro Audio Surprise female "Are You Shittin' Me with this", Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,
374748 0:01 USD $7.15  


SHE'S A CHEAP SLUT! - (by AJ Pro Audio)
AJ Pro Audio Well spoken angry lady's comedy voice "She's a cheap slut!", Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,
359066 0:01 USD $7.15  


COMICAL KISSES - (by CinE-Sounds: Sounds with Effects)
CinE-Sounds: Sounds with Effects Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,
321926 1:00 USD $6.35  


OH, YEAH - (by Brenda Elthon)
Brenda Elthon Deep male voice tells you "oh, yeah." Boy, he really means it! We must have done a good job! The perfect exclamation point for way too many jokes. Radio ready audio for naughty, but good natured fun. Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
533447 0:09 USD $1.95  
Variation (shorter version) - Talking, Baudy  
533848 0:04 USD $1.50  


OH, YEAH - (by Brenda Elthon)
Brenda Elthon Deep male voice tells you "oh, yeah." Boy, he really means it! We must have done a good job! The perfect exclamation point for way too many jokes. Radio ready audio for naughty, but good natured fun. Talking, Baudy
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Talking, Baudy  
530082 0:09 USD $1.95  
Variation (shorter version) - Comedy,  
530091 0:04 USD $1.50  


TESTING 1... 2... 3... - (by Music And SFX)
Music And SFX Testing 1... 2... 3... (microphone check), Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
487783 0:06 USD $1.95  


DR. SEUSS IN DA HOOD COMMERCIAL - (by Hollywood Post)
Hollywood Post Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
46480 0:39 USD $7.25  


MIRROR MIRROR - (by Pete Bax)
Pete Bax Mirror Mirror comedy monologue, Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,
333012 0:57 USD $6.35  


GARGLED USA ANTHEM - (by Ian Hubball)
Ian Hubball The USA national Anthem gargled ! Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,
446201 0:08 USD $1.95  


TALIBAN NEEDS ANSWERING MACHINES - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Taliban needs answering machines, Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
63207 1:51 USD $11.95  


WHAT ARE YOU DOING TODAY? - (by Brenda Elthon)
Brenda Elthon Hillbilly gal in jeans and braids asks "What are you doin tuh-day?" in flat, Tennesse comedy accent. Regional humor made famous by the Beverly Hillbillies and Green Acres. Remember those funny tv sitcoms? A classic Americana form of good natured humor that never goes out of style. Come on, laugh, Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
534669 0:02 USD $1.50  


DONALD DUCK VOICE - OH MY.... WITH CHAINSAW SOUND - (by Hollywood Post)
Hollywood Post Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
3971 0:09 USD $2.55  


DATING A GHOST JOKE - (by Hollywood Post)
Hollywood Post Ghost joke in club, Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
206072 0:20 USD $4.10  


GHOST HUMOR - (by Hollywood Post)
Hollywood Post Ghost jokes, Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
205818 0:17 USD $4.10  


BOB HOPE AT ST. PATRICK'S DAY PARTY - (by Hollywood Post)
Hollywood Post Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
44718 0:13 USD $3.10  


MACARENA EATS LEAD - (by Hollywood Post)
Hollywood Post Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
11769 0:21 USD $4.10  


CHICKETY CHINA CHINESE CHICKEN SKIT - (by Hollywood Post)
Hollywood Post Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
52613 2:26 USD $16.60  


BARNEY SINGING AND BEING SHOT AND CHAINSAWED - (by Hollywood Post)
Hollywood Post Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
3546 0:12 USD $3.00  


THE QUIET STORM 2-27-97 - (by Hollywood Post)
Hollywood Post Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
48332 4:17 USD $11.95  


SILLY GHOST JOKE - (by Hollywood Post)
Hollywood Post Skeleton joke, Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
206075 0:26 USD $5.15  


JOKE ABOUT DATING A GHOST - (by Hollywood Post)
Hollywood Post Ghost jokes, Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
206069 0:37 USD $7.25  


SKELETON JOKE IN CLUB - (by Hollywood Post)
Hollywood Post Skeleton joke in club, Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Full Track - Comedy,  
206071 0:24 USD $5.15  


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KEYWORDS: Jokes, funny lines, hilarious skits sounds
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